whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Randomize
