Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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