I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
Randomize
