I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
This show inspires me to have sex in space
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Randomize
