Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
