I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
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