Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
