I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
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