i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
Randomize
