Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Randomize
