I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
