Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Sext me about skeletons
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
