i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
