we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
