Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
Randomize
