You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
