Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize
