id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
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