I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
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