he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Randomize
