from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
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