their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
Randomize