I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
