im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Randomize
