Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
