i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
