you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
I just found puke in my bra..
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
