this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
Randomize
