You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Randomize
