i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
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