i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
