3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize
