my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
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