She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Randomize
