How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize
