its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
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