Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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