Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Randomize
