I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
