I think I won the penis lottery.
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
I see more hoeing in ur future
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