i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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