Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Randomize
