quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
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