the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Randomize
