why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I feel like abortions should bother me more
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
