I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
How does it feel to date your dad?
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize