So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
literally had 100 drinks last night.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
