He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
