Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
