porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
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