I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
